From the Desk of baxtermurphyblog
Dear Baxter and Murphy,
You may have noticed that I was grumpy, cold, and dismissive this morning. My behavior had nothing to do with normal morning blues, but, rather, was a direct reaction to the extreme mess you left me during the night. In light of this event, I feel it is time to enact some House Rules.
1. Playing With Yarn
If you'd like to play with yarn, I have a ball just for you! It usually resides on an end table, but is frequently strewn about the apartment. Feel free to chew, rip, chase, or cuddle with this yarn. It is not appropriate, however, to open partially ajar desk drawers during the night and extract knitting projects, needles and all, and wind this yarn all over the apartment, forcing me to cut it up in order to untangle it.
2. Scratching
Great places to scratch include the carpet and the scratching post. If you must scratch the couch, please do it while I'm not home. If I'm not there to see it, I can't punish you! If you do decide to risk scratching it while I'm home, please refrain from doing so while I am trying to sleep. Making me get out of bed to reprimand you does neither of us any good.
3. Special note to Baxter Re: The Blinds
You may have noticed that I am perfectly happy to put up the blinds for you during the day. This allows you to gaze lazily out the window, stare at the pigeons, or nap in the sun. But once it is dark out, people can see inside so it is imperative that I close the blinds. I apologize for this inconvenience, however it is not appropriate to attempt to climb through the blinds so that you can look out the window. This behavior may cause choking or cut you, and is also damaging to the blinds. One day I hope to get curtains to accommodate us both, but for now I'd appreciate your compliance with this rule.
4. Special note to Murphy Re: Running/Jumping
I appreciate your playful nature, however if you must run from one end of the apartment to the other, please do not use me as a "jumping off" board. If you are going to hop from bed to couch to table to floor and I am sitting on/near any of those items, please do not include me as an "object of furniture to jump on." It hurts. A lot.
In return for your cooperation with the above items, I promise to:
1. Feed you
2. Provide you with shelter
3. Snuggle with you
4. Buy/make you toys
5. Entertain you
Sincerely,
The Management
You may have noticed that I was grumpy, cold, and dismissive this morning. My behavior had nothing to do with normal morning blues, but, rather, was a direct reaction to the extreme mess you left me during the night. In light of this event, I feel it is time to enact some House Rules.
1. Playing With Yarn
If you'd like to play with yarn, I have a ball just for you! It usually resides on an end table, but is frequently strewn about the apartment. Feel free to chew, rip, chase, or cuddle with this yarn. It is not appropriate, however, to open partially ajar desk drawers during the night and extract knitting projects, needles and all, and wind this yarn all over the apartment, forcing me to cut it up in order to untangle it.
2. Scratching
Great places to scratch include the carpet and the scratching post. If you must scratch the couch, please do it while I'm not home. If I'm not there to see it, I can't punish you! If you do decide to risk scratching it while I'm home, please refrain from doing so while I am trying to sleep. Making me get out of bed to reprimand you does neither of us any good.
3. Special note to Baxter Re: The Blinds
You may have noticed that I am perfectly happy to put up the blinds for you during the day. This allows you to gaze lazily out the window, stare at the pigeons, or nap in the sun. But once it is dark out, people can see inside so it is imperative that I close the blinds. I apologize for this inconvenience, however it is not appropriate to attempt to climb through the blinds so that you can look out the window. This behavior may cause choking or cut you, and is also damaging to the blinds. One day I hope to get curtains to accommodate us both, but for now I'd appreciate your compliance with this rule.
4. Special note to Murphy Re: Running/Jumping
I appreciate your playful nature, however if you must run from one end of the apartment to the other, please do not use me as a "jumping off" board. If you are going to hop from bed to couch to table to floor and I am sitting on/near any of those items, please do not include me as an "object of furniture to jump on." It hurts. A lot.
In return for your cooperation with the above items, I promise to:
1. Feed you
2. Provide you with shelter
3. Snuggle with you
4. Buy/make you toys
5. Entertain you
Sincerely,
The Management
posted by Cheryl @ 10:09 AM
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